{{ simply being loved - chapter 15
Jacen Solo awoke, drowsy, confused. All he was aware of at that moment was a soft shuffling noise. He couldn't see anything and was sitting upright, in a slightly uncomortable chair. When he tried to move, that's when he realized it.
He was bound to the chair.
A pair of old stuncuffs were clasped around his wrists and his arms were pulled back in a manner which stressed the joints of his shoulders. Slowly rotating his shoulders let him know that the back of the chair came up to the level of his collarbone. Moving his feet didn't help anything either, except letting him know that they too were tied to the chair. His left constrained to the left leg of the chair and vise-versa with his right. The fibercords he was bound with were boring into his chest.
And it wasn't dark in the room... he didn't have his eyes closed. There was a piece of rough cloth tied around his head, covering his brandy-browns. He could feel it scratching his skin, rubbing against it, digging into his cheekbones and he could faintly see streams of moonlight filtering through the tiny holes in the cloth. Jacen's feet were bare, as well as his chest and slowly squirming around as much as he could, he could confirm the fact that he was still clad in his tan flightsuit pants.
"Hello?" His voice was hoarse.
Jacen felt a bit dizzy and out of place. The smell of the Hapan sea and the breeze on his scathed cheeks led him to believe that he was still in the Queen Mother's chambers. The temperature and atmosphere was roughly the same, and Jacen knew this, even though shivers were finding their way up and down his spine.
"Jacen. I am so glad to see that you are awake." A female voice, throaty, dripping with something between lust and violence.
He cringed at the familiarity of it. The voice sounded depraved of anything remotely cordial.
Jacen leaned his head back on the top edge of the chair, "What's going on?"
A hand, warm and comforting, caressed the spot behind his right ear and Jacen could feel the cords of his neck instantly tense up. The hand ran down to his neck and then up through his hair, down to the front of his face. It tugged at the makeshift blindfold and ripped it off.
Jacen, after letting his blurry eyes adjust, suddenly felt them tear up at the sight that stood before him.
Cascading in long waves down her back, her copper-red hair complemented her dress, a tight, dark, emerald gown, exactly the color of the dense jungles of Yavin 4. One of the thin straps hung off of her left shoulder and fell to where her skin met with ebony metal. The front tied from her waist up, acting like a corset. It was laced wrong, the ties diving into mismatching holes and ultimately meeting at the top in a crooked knot. The gown, like most of the Queen Mother's other clothes, was spun out of the finest Hapan silk. The dress was wrinkled in places and torn in some small spots, but Tenel Ka, even in her deranged state, still possessed that newfound unmatchable air of elegance. Jacen let his widened eyes travel down the Queen Mother with a look of shock that accompanied his exact feelings. He knew that if Tenel Ka had been acting like her normal self, that little voice inside his head, that he tried not to listen to, would have been begging him to go ravish her.
But she had been acting odd. Ever since the marriage announcement. Ever since the appearance of her new arm.
The obsidian metallic arm looked out of place with her tawny skin and her luminous silver eyes. The black lining Jacen had noticed around her eyes while she was stretched out on the sofa, was now drifting down towards her cheeks, running from tears or sweat, or both. Jacen had no idea which. Her eyes, still taking on that disconcerting shade of sterling, now had noticable shadowy bags under them. And to top it all off, around her neck, sat the gort eggshell necklace Jacen had made for her when they were younger. Tenel Ka's tongue drifted across her lips as she stared down to the boy who joked with her so many years ago.
"There are so many things I could do to you right now," she crossed her contrasting arms.
Jacen felt a single drop of something run down his cheek. His mind was too busy to tell if it was sweat or a tear. But he worked it out to be the latter.
"This is only the first," Tenel Ka smacked Jacen across the right cheek, the opposite cheek of the previous slap and she didn't do it as hard as before. But it was enough to make the tear vanish with the echoing sound of pain.
Jacen Solo was used to pain, thanks to the his time with the Yuuzhan Vong. He learned how to draw strength from it. Even mental anguish, along with physical pain, he could deal with.
But seeing the girl--- no... the woman he fell in love with so different, so hurt, so...
Evil. I can feel it.
Silghtly opening himself up to the Force, he could feel the black void in her system growing stronger. The Dark Side was inhabiting her.
But how?
The General took a deep breath, "Why are you doing this? What's come over you?"
Her voice cracked and her head tilted, "Love."
"What?"
She stepped forward, hiking her gown up to a comfortable thigh level and straddled his lap, seating herself. She placed a single cold onyx finger under his chin. "I am in love Jacen Solo. I am sure even people like you have felt love before."
With that comment, a stray cough erupted from Jacen as he felt his insides collapase. Every organ in his body seemed to scream out.
Especially his heart.
Tenel Ka sensed what he was thinking and added to the hurt, enjoying every second of Jacen's winces and cringes. "Gadell has given me things you could never even dream of giving me, dear." Wrapping her jet black fingers around the necklace, she ripped it off and threw it to the ground behind her, as if to emphasize her point.
Jacen couldn't stand it anymore. He couldn't deal with it. He had to attempt to drive this insanity out of Tenel Ka. "What has he given you?" Jacen asked in the firmest voice he could manage. "A tremendously vicious attitude?"
The Queen Mother's eyes widened as she pulled herself further onto his lap, wrapping her long legs around him and the chair. Her sudden movement caused Jacen to turn his head and let out a deep breath at the current state of his comfort. He could feel the curves of her shapely figure pressed against him and he morbidly thought:
Any other time...
The sea breeze was blowing through the double doors around them, but Jacen could feel himself sweating.
He shut his eyes and a few moments passed, with his head still turned to the the side. Jacen could feel a lone drop of sweat trickle down the hollow of his neck and just as it was about to reach his collarbone he felt Tenel Ka lean forward and inertly lick it away, her copper hair tickling his jawbone. He supressed a shudder as she pulled her head back.
Jacen. Hello?! This IS NOT how things are supposed to be.
Hearing his own words in his mind, he turned his head back from the side, to face her, trailing his narrowed auburn eyes to her mercury shaded orbs, "You never answered my question."
A small, lopsided grin formed across her lips. It reminded Jacen of a haunting, empty counterpart to the smile he used to cheer her up with. Tenel Ka put her hands on either side of his face, her warm flesh touching his left cheek and her cold, black digits resting on his right.
And with that, she leaned forward and planted her lips on his.
They felt like ice.
She pressed her lithe body against his constrained form, letting her lips linger on his. Jacen returned the kiss weakly. He thought maybe if he played along, she'd release some sort of hint or information about her current emotional and mental state. He also played along becase he wished that maybe just one kiss from him would make her realize...
...please...
Tenel Ka slowly withdrew and glared into his eyes.
...no...
He could feel it through their connection, as their lips met.
Jacen had lost her.
...anger leads to hate.
With a twitch, Tenel Ka took her hands away from Jacen's face. At that exact second, he could've sworn that a remorseful expression captured her visage for a moment. An expression of sorrow, of depression.
Like an apology.
He watched her slide off of his lap and stumble towards the balcony. There was a large rip in her dress, at the small of her back, one behind her right knee. Each tear was like a stab towards Jacen. Just another piece of her flesh exposed, just another reason for Jacen to inwardly curse at himself for letting this happen to him...
...to her...
Silence swam around the room for a few awkward minutes, as Tenel Ka stood out on the balcony, staring out over the sea. The pain in Jacen's body was blinding, but he blocked it out.
He sensed the door of the chamber slide open.
No... NO.
A hollow laugh filtered into the room, shattering the dead air. Jacen's back was to the door and he obviously couldn't turn around to see who it was... but he knew. He could hear the clicking of boot heels on the stone, getting louder as they closed in on Jacen's constrained form. A few feet away from him, they became muffled by the carpet. The next thing Jacen knew, there was a mouth inches away from his ear, hissing:
"During my meeting, I heard of a Jedi snooping around in royal business matters. You're the first one I thought of, General!"
Gadell.
The Commander grabbed the chair from the vanity table and spun it around backwards, planting it in front of Jacen and setting himself down in it. Icy blue eyes met with bloodshot browns.
"Aren't you touched to know that I thought about you first?"
Jacen swallowed, his throat parched, "So very."
Gadell, dressed in a black tunic and matching black pants, rested his arms on the back of the chair as he carried on his practically one-sided conversation with Jacen Solo.
But the General spoke up again, "I know about Ta'a Chume."
Tenel Ka entered from the balcony, snarling, "I told you Solo, that old mynock is gone." She walked up behind Gadell and draped her arms around his neck causing him to rest his head back against her stomach. Vessau raised his eyebrows and lowered them with a hint of a grin on his face, letting Jacen know that he was right. Tenel Ka had no idea about Ta'a Chume, and Gadell was obviously keeping it that way.
The Commander pulled himself from Tenel Ka's grasp, up out of the chair and glanced to her. He only stood a few inches taller than her, Jacen noticed this as he silently watched Gadell push the chair back under the vanity table then look to his fiancée.
"What happened to your dress?" Gadell stared down to the tears.
"I got bored," she replied, glancing at herself in the mirror that loomed on the wall behind the bound Jacen Solo. "I think it looks good. Do you not?"
Gadell's head tilted to the side, as he looked at the dress in the mirror. He dug his right pointer finger into a small rip above her right hip and tugged at it, lengthening the tear around to her stomach. "I think it looks better like that."
Oh no no. You get your retched hands off of her.
Jacen sat, staring straight ahead. He tried not to watch Tenel Ka and Gadell, who stood a few feet away from him, to his right. But his eyes always seemed to find their way back to them. He could see their silhouettes in the moonlight. Whispering sweet nothings to each other. Gadell running his hands up and down her sides as he leaned in to kiss her.
...
As he leaned in to kiss her deeply.
...stop looking at them you idiot. It'll just make you more angry.
Jacen tried not to look at them. But he didn't listen to the voice in his head. He saw the silhouettes, the shadow of Gadell's tongue as it slid past Tenel Ka's lips. The way the sliver of moonlight between them vanished as they pulled one another as close as possible, Gadell slipping his fingers into the tears of the gown as he let his hands roam.
Solo watched as Tenel Ka slowly pushed the Commander away, a sly smile breaching her lips, "I am going to sleep now. I have had a busy day..."
"Yeah, sitting around the room. So busy," Gadell added sarcastically, in an annoyingly flirtatious tone, not letting his eyes leave Tenel Ka as she meandered to Jacen.
"Good night, Jacen. Sleep tight." She ruffled his hair with her onyx fingers and turned back towards the bed, falling into it when she got there, her torn dress settling around her.
Gadell tore his eyes away from the bed and looked to Jacen, with a mischievous grin. The smile faded as he padded over to the chair the General was tied to and hunched down in front of it. Jacen glared straight into the icy depths of Gadell's eyes, narrowing his own in a visual dare.
Go ahead and try something.
Tilting his head slightly, Gadell leaned up and locked lips with Jacen Solo, only for a few moments, before pulling back and hissing; "That's the closest your lips will ever be to Tenel Ka's again." He stood up and began backing away. "Ever."
Reflexively running his tongue over his own lips, Jacen could taste a faint trace of Tenel Ka's lips. It was the taste that he had reveled in the night he had climbed down from her balcony, the taste that kept him absently watching over her from afar.
The taste that Gadell just said he would never experience again.
"Ever?" Jacen whispered calmly.
Gadell nodded. He stood halfway between the Queen Mother's occupied bed and the chair in which the General sat, motionless.
The Commander debated in his head whether or not he wanted to join Tenel Ka in bed, or torment Jacen Solo more.
Obviously, being Gadell Vessau, he picked the latter choice.
Pacing the room he stopped in front of Jacen, almost smashing the gort eggshell necklace under his boot. Jacen sighed a breath of relief as his foot just missed it. He obviously didn't even see it either, and that made Jacen feel the slightest bit alright.
"You're going to come to the wedding, right Solo?" His eyes took on a feigned look of concern. Jacen could see the sarcasm wading in them.
Rocking his head upwards, Jacen pursed his lips, thinking back to what Anhaje had said.
"That is just like you Jacen. Always the peacekeeper."
Not right now, Anhaje... not right now.
With that thought, Jacen spit into Gadell's face. "I wouldn't miss it for anything, Commander," the General added.
Running his right hand down his face, Gadell tried to stay as calm as possible. Wiping all the spit off of his cheek, he proceeded to run his hand through Jacen's unruly brown mop of hair, "You won't be doing that again." After swabbing off the remnants of the saliva into Jacen's own hair, Gadell reached to the ground and picked up the cloth that was tied over Jacen's eyes earlier. Gadell could see where it chafed into his cheekbones and near the corners of his eyes. He straightened the piece of cloth out and stepped around behind the Jedi, throwing it in front of his face and then yanking it back in between his lips. Vessau tied it as tight as he could manage and then smiled as he came back around into Jacen's view.
"Go ahead and try it again, fool."
Jacen's lips were parted by the piece of rough cloth and he could already feel it scratching at the corners of his mouth. He continued to glare up to Gadell, eyebrows furrowing.
Snickering towards Jacen, Gadell turned to face the balcony. Spinning back, the Commander began to pace around Jacen's chair in a circle. "General." He flicked the back of Jacen's ear. "I am so pleased," he pushed his head, whipping it to the side, "to see that you understand my love for Tenel Ka." Gadell stepped on the toes on Jacen's left foot, grinding them into the carpet, "I am glad to see that you're taking it so well." Clasping his hands behind his back, he took a step back from the battered General. "I know you two have a... history."
Jacen sat, constrained and bruised. The corners of his mouth, leaking meager amounts of blood. His sepia toned eyes, swollen, bloodshot and dry. Sweat dripping from his brow, down his face, splashing into the grooves the fibercord was creating in his chest and finally getting soaked into the top hem of his pants.
Yet Jacen continued to bore his deep eyes into Gadell's, not letting their gaze break.
"Gadell," Tenel Ka called out sleepily from the bed.
"Yes dear?" He slightly turned his head to the side.
"Stop playing with him."
Yeah, stop playing with me you kriffing idiot.
Tenel Ka continued, "Come play with me."
NO. DON'T STOP PLAYING WITH ME YOU KRIFFING IDIOT.
"But you're tired..." Gadell slinked over to the bed and glanced down to Tenel Ka who had already fallen back into a deep slumber. Sitting down on the edge of the bed, he looked back across the room at Jacen.
"Isn't she just the sweetest thing, General Solo?"
Gadell crawled over the Queen Mother and laid down beside her. Wiggling out of his tunic, leaving him in his pants, he threw the ball of black fabric to the ground, then dangled his arm over her stomach. "Sleep well, Jacen," Gadell called back to him, as he cuddled under the covers with Tenel Ka.
Jacen shot a glimpse to the bed. He could see Tenel Ka, lying on her side facing him, her eyes shut, her face serene even considering the black lining smeared across it. Her smooth metal arm was nuzzled under her cheek and her right was set up beside it, her face almost resting in her hands. The covers were draped only up to her knees and in the moonlight, he could see Gadell's right arm hanging over her hip, his fingers absently rubbing across her skin in the tear he had made at her stomach.
The General frowned. This whole time he knew he had the strength to break his bonds and rip himself out of the chair. He could've easily pulled himself free.
But he could gauge his own emotions.
He knew if he did break free, he would've killed Gadell and possibly even maimed Tenel Ka, for acting so bizarre and demented.
The petty fibercords were the only thing keeping him from going insane. And possibly reaching a level near the Dark Side.
Throwing one more glance to the lone necklace lying discarded on the carpet, he began running through each and every Jedi relaxation technique he knew. Jacen rolled his eyes back into his head and let himself fall into a trance-induced sleep.
It was going to be a long night.
| 