{{ simply being loved - chapter 05
The banquet was held in the same chamber the ceremonies were in. It was an enormous room with high ceilings and stone walls. Seeping through man-made cracks in the walls were vines of dried Hapan carnivorous seaweed, crawling up towards the top edge of the room. The ceiling was made of the strongest glass invented and the dim light of the room let the glow from the moons and the stars spill into the chamber.
The food was already cleared out of the room, as were the tables. Jacen thought the banquet itself was delicious, but uneventful. He was seated at a huge round table with his parents, Tahiri Veila, Jagged Fel and his twin sister, Jaina Solo. As they were seating themselves, Jaina shoved Jacen towards the seat that gave him the best view of the front of the room, where the court was seated.
Where Tenel Ka was seated.
Where Gadell was seated.
Jacen watched them the whole time. Sitting beside each other.
He could feel her taking it and dealing with it. He could feel her through the Force.
He could feel the fact that she wanted to lean over and smack him. But she couldn't. She had to look like she was playing along, for her people.
Jacen observed every little movement. The way he would use his slender fingers to push the curtain of copper out of her face. The way he leaned in closer to her to tell her something. The way random locks of his black hair would curl onto her cheek as he murmured things into her ear. The way she let the tiniest bit of a smile through her shield.
From her it was all an act, Jacen knew.
But is it an act from him?
Jacen stood against the wall, staring up at the sky through the clear ceiling. He was holding a glass of simple Hapan Ale. He didn't drink much alcohol at all, in fact, he had taken one sip of it and then just stood there, holding it and staring at the sky. It wasn't that it was bad... he just wasn't in the mood to do much of anything.
As he absently stared up to the heavens, the music started playing. It floated through the chamber, reaching his ears and calming his nerves. He had no sense of time after he closed his eyes.
A few minutes passed. He just stood there, with his back against the wall, his drink in his hand, his head tilted back and his eyes closed.
Her gray eyes went wide as she dropped the glass from her hand. She was standing in front of Jacen, talking to him about random things...
Then she took a sip of her drink...
Blood seeped out of the corners of her mouth as she held her throat with her right hand. Jacen grabbed her waist and proceeded to rock her a bit, "Tenel Ka!"
The Queen Mother's eyes locked on his, they were losing color. Her face was losing color.
She was losing color, losing life.
What do I do?!
The blood dribbled onto her gown and down to the floor, before she fell into his arms, smearing his CorSec outfit with a mix of blood and saliva.
"Tenel Ka?!"
He shook her back and forth. No one was giving them a second glance. Hundreds of people in the chamber, no one noticed. Everything was silent. He couldn't even hear himself screaming her name.
She glanced up to him one more time, gurgling something unintelligible. No words were escaping her mouth.
Only blood. Rich, red blood.
And everything was moving slowly.
"Jacen?"
The music floated to his ears once more, along with a soothing voice, inquiring just why he was standing there, absently dozing off.
"Your highness. I..." He blinked a couple of times. Jacen Solo was at a loss for words.
A Hapan male walked up to the pair with a tray of drinks and offered them up. Tenel Ka took the glass closest to her off of the tray. Jacen raised his, showing the man he already had one. The man smiled and started making his rounds to other people.
"You look beautiful tonight, your worship."
"Why thank you, General Solo. You do not look so bad yourself," The Queen Mother let a genuine smile cross her face and tilted the drink back, taking a sip.
Wait... no!
Jacen grabbed the drink away from Tenel Ka, "It's poisoned."
"What?"
Jacen could only stare in awe, expecting blood to drip from her ruby lips at any moment.
Nothing happened.
A look of confusion attacked Jacen's face as he slowly handed the Queen Mother's drink back to her.
"Are you feeling alright, Jacen?"
He was tempted to tell her of the dreams and visions he was having, but he refrained from it as a new song snuck into the chamber.
A shake of the head, "I'm fine. How about that dance now, Tenel Ka?"
Setting their glasses down upon a sidetable on their way to the crowd, Jacen watched as the Queen Mother ducked through the crowd. She never ceased to amaze him, even as the Queen Mother, she still moved like she did when they were young.
Quick reflexes, fast paced. She sneaked around couples, ducked under swinging arms.
She was still Tenel Ka.
After a suitable spot was found, Tenel Ka turned around to face Jacen. He took her right hand in his left and wrapped his other arm around her waist.
And a pang of guilt struck him as he didn't feel a hand on his back. Tenel Ka learned a long time ago to live with the absence of half of her left arm.
Jacen never lived with it.
"I felt that," Tenel Ka cocked her head to the side, referring to his guilt.
Without even realizing it, both of them fully opened up to each other in the Force as they joined hands on the dance floor.
"You did, didn't you?" Jacen sighed, "I'm still sorr---"
"Do not start that with me again. We have been through this billions of times."
They spun around on the floor, nearly missing Jaina and Zekk, who laughed on the way by.
"I know. I'll be quiet about it now," Jacen bit his lip.
"I am sure you will, Jacen Solo." Tenel Ka said it with no emotion at all, but he could sense incredibly high amounts of sarcasm in their Force connection.
Jacen chuckled and dipped the Queen Mother in front of where Jagged Fel, Tahiri Veila, Lowbacca and Alema Rar were standing, chatting to each other.
All four of them waved to Jacen and Tenel Ka, as he quickly pulled her out of the dip. Jacen smiled back and the dizzy Queen Mother nodded her head, grinning slightly in the group's direction.
A giggle erupted around the four as the pair danced away from them. Moments, and a few head-clearing blinks later, Tenel Ka scowled.
"What?" He inquired innocently, reminding Tenel Ka too much of Han Solo.
They made it back to Lowie, Jag, Tahiri and Alema.
Tenel Ka let go of his left hand and threw her arm around his waist, dipping him backwards, quicker than he did to her.
Claps sounded from the group as Tenel Ka nodded, pulling Jacen back up. She let a sly smirk creep onto her face, and grabbed his left hand again.
Jacen blinked, "That was so... mean." Chuckling and shaking his head, he directed her away from their friends and back to the middle of the floor.
Songs passed where they wouldn't even say anything to each other. They would just stare into each other eyes. They were dancing together for what seemed like hours.
Jacen closed his eyes for a few moments and let the Force lead them around the floor. He cackled wildly after they almost ran into Kyp Durron and Danni Quee, who also laughed it off.
A flash of a vision violated Jacen as he swung Tenel Ka around with his eyes closed. He could feel a cold hand creeping up his back. Metallic. Icy.
His eyes opened.
"Are you alright?" Tenel Ka whispered.
He nodded, feeling the absence of anything on his back.
After another song passed, Tenel Ka knew she had to tell him what had been bugging her.
"You seem to be feeling down," Jacen tilted his head as he let his grip tighten at the small of her back.
"Jacen..."
"Something's been gnawing at you. I can feel it. What's wrong?"
He could feel her desperation, complete with slight twinges of anger.
"I am to be married."
Jacen felt it coming. He knew it all along.
But it still bit into him like a wild voxyn ripping it's catch apart.
"That's great, Tenel Ka." Jacen let a smile cross his face. There was no emotion to the smile. There was emptiness.
She could feel his sudden downhill turn of emotions, and he could feel the same in her.
Jacen didn't even want to know why she had to get married, surely it was Gadell. Jacen had seen the way he was acting around her. And Jacen knew Gadell was very popular among the people of Hapes.
He could tell she didn't want to speak of it.
He tried to act happy for her. "Wow. My best friend, all grown up... taking care of herself now..."
"I always took care of myself."
"I know, I know... I was---"
"Just kidding? Jacen Solo... you are always just kidding."
An empty chuckle escaped his pursed lips.
Looking into her eyes, he knew it had to be done now or never.
'Go tell her, Jacen.'
"I'm not always kidding."
She twisted her face into a quizzical stare and waited for him to back himself up.
"I was never kidding whenever I told myself that I've always been in lov---"
"Hello there. Mind if I cut in?"
Gadell slipped into view, stealing the Queen Mother from Jacen's grasp.
Jacen stammered, "N--no. Not at all."
A sly grin formed on Gadell's face, "Thank you, General Solo. And don't you look dashing tonight?"
Jacen forced a nod and a smile, "Thank you Commander."
Gadell led Tenel Ka away.
Their force connection was still open and burning brighter then ever. He assulted her with his emotions and words.
'I was never kidding whenever I told myself that I've always been in LOVE WITH YOU.'
Jacen watched them dancing and as he recited those words in his head --- he saw her stumble.
She heard him. She heard him loud and clear.
And there was Jacen Solo, standing alone in the middle of a sea of people. Laughing. Dancing. Drinking.
He felt a shudder creep up his spine as his eyes closed. He could feel people floating around him, fabrics rustling against him as he stood there alone. He felt the metal hand on his back again.
His eyes shot open.
He hesitated a few moments and turning around, dodging people, he ran out of the chamber, through the hallways and out into the gardens.
All was quiet.
And in the silence, in his head, through their connection, he could hear the soft voice he had grown to adore, repeating itself over and over.
'jacen solo I love you too jacen I love you please say something jacen please'
The garden became a blur.
Jacen Solo stumbled to the memorial grove. The faces of the fallen were blurred.
Everything was blurred.
The soft, pleading voice was violently cut off.
'jacen please i love you i----'
Through the Force he felt a shot of pain.
He collapsed.
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